Advice: teacher crush
I have been developing really strong feelings for my PE teacher. He is single. Lots of the girls in my class are into him but for me its not just like an ordinary crush, it’s much more. He’s funny and sooo HOT. I think about him all the time and am totally shy around him. I know teachers and students aren’t really meant to go out but I think we could be different. I can’t get him out of my mind, it’s hard to focus on anything else. What should I do?
Kazza, 17. Gold Coast, Qld
Our psychologist says: Many students fall for teachers at some stage during their school career. While you can’t necessarily control how you feel about this guy, it’s really important this only remains a ‘crush’ and you don’t cross any boundaries by trying to take it further. A high school teacher having a ‘romantic’ relationship with one of his students is actually against the law. There are power issues (he is in a position of ‘authority’ over you) and probably age differences which would make a relationship a no-go zone even if he did share your feelings. If your teacher was to over step the mark by going out with you he’d probably lose his job and face legal consequences. Accept that while you’re strongly attracted to this guy, it wouldn’t be wise to act on these feelings. Even though it may be tempting, avoid flirting with him or trying anything on as it’ll only cause headaches for everyone. While it’s a challenge, try to interact with him in the same way as you would any other teacher. Whenever you get lost in thoughts about him remind yourself: “nothing can happen, let it go”. In class try to distract yourself from ‘crushing thoughts’ by focussing on other things (eg. getting absorbed in your work). Keep your social life busy. Spend time with friends and get involved in activities where you can meet new people. Be open to getting to know other guys too. The more emotional energy you start investing elsewhere, hopefully the less overwhelming your teacher crush will become.
(image credit necrodreamer)
Over to you: Our psychologist has made a few suggestions, but what do you think? Have you ever had a crush on a teacher? How did you manage it? Do you have any ideas for Kazza?